All learning is self learning

I was at the playground with my son and watched the mother while she struggled with her toddler: "Don't do that! I am taking you away now! You have to learn how to share!"

I did not judge her, I have a toddler myself and I recognise the deep challenges of being a mother. But I sat there thinking... Most of what we call "misbehaving" at this stage is actually just a child going trough the process of learning something. Children, like everyone, will not "learn" anything before they are ready, and putting them under pressure to do so will not help. If you think about it that is why most of the learning we do in our early years of babyhood is called "milestones". Achievements we make by ourselves. 

You do not need to teach your baby how to walk or train your toddler how to go potty; and there is no use on wanting a pre-Scholler to "share", "take turns", "wait", or "be quiet". It will simply not happen just because you want it to. There is no use on forcing anything, and what a relief that is (!), that we can just let nature do the work. We cannot train babies (doesn't matter what some books say!) and most of all, we do not need to.

What to do in between? How to manage it? Realise it is a phase, it will pass, it will change (you might even come to miss it, when bigger, deeper challenges come).

Be present, be patient and loving. 

Let them take their time.

We can only do what we are ready to do. Respect the sacredness of nature's timings, your child embodies them.

#ommmmmmamma

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